Food stores have run out completely. I’m alone.
I wish they hadn’t snapped. I’d give anything for a friend right now. Sitting here shivering as I write this, in this cramped space, surrounded by two stiff bodies. The stench is unbearable. It’s penetrated every nook of the ship. Even with my face pressed against the vents, I can’t escape it.
Out the window, the Earth has become a tiny dot. I’m not even sure anymore if it’s the Earth, or just a bright star. I’m so alone.
That banging. It’s constant. They said they couldn’t hear it, but it started after the explosion, after the radio went dead, and it hasn’t stopped. It’s driving me mad. Mike and his stupid ignorance. Trying to pretend that he couldn’t hear it. Like the slap of some monster against the hull. They ignored it. I think it drove them mad. They tried to lock me up. There was nothing I could do.
They would have killed me, just because they wanted me to pretend it wasn’t there. That banging, it’s so cold. I did what I had to do. The rescue mission should be here any minute.
Mike said I was losing it. He blamed me for killing Frank. As spherical droplets of blood dripped from his severed flesh. He protested until his last minute. I know they were trying to kill me though. Trying to stuff me away. I did what I had to do.
It’s so cold. The rescue mission will be here any minute. God, that banging. What hell is this? Why me? Why am I the only one who sees? Why did they lose it? Why did they make me defend myself? I’d do anything for a friend, anything to stop that banging against the hull. The engines couldn’t fire. We missed our intercept and drifted past the asteroid with a dead engine. They said it was my fault. They said I lashed out and broke the equipment, that I snapped.
But it wasn’t me. They were the ones, distracted by the banging, distracted because they were trying so hard to pretend they couldn’t hear it. Part of the engine banging. They tried to sabotage the mission, but I couldn’t stop them in time. They broke it, and blamed me. They said I busted the control panel with a wrench. They tried to put it all on me, but I know it was them. I had to stop them, I had to do it.
They came for me. I took the wrench to defend myself, and they smashed the controls while I tried to stop them. I did what I had to do. They ruined everything. I’m never going home.
My tears are sticking to my face. Stupid zero g. Stupid space. Stupid mission. They did this to me. Why? Why is it so cold? Why doesn’t the banging stop. Please make it stop. Just make it stop.
I can stop it. I’m going to stop it. I still have the wrench. I’m so alone. I have to do it. They made me do it. They left me like this. Anything to stop the banging.